Mates Mrs died last night

[Damie Karras]

Bit surreal this,

Woke up this morning to see a picture on fb of my mate and his bird with the message "I lost my best friend tonight", I was like the fuck is he on about, it's a joke surely.
Reading the comments true enough she was gone, I couldn't get my head around it. It was 530am far to early to ring him and I'm no allowed my phone in work. I brought my phone with me anyway but have to submit it for security scanning and not allowed it with me, I had to pretend I had brought it by mistake and didn't really know if I'd get it back from security.

Anyway this shit is playing on my mind, the fuck has happened? She can't be dead she's only turned 40 and was the life and soul of the group. I'm raging I can't just ring him, ring anyone and find out what is going on back home.
I'm questioning myself, is money really that important, I should be at home should anything so out of the ordinary ever happen to my family. It's really upset me, and yet, I still don't know what the fuck is really going on.

At 2pm I visit security, sure enough I get my fucking phone for 5 minutes. I ring my mate no answer. I ring my missus, she's heard nothing just a text from my lad saying yes she had indeed passed away.
This is fucking killing me, felt so distant and helpless.

Eventually when I get back to the digs I get my phone and the chance to ring him. He's balling down the phone, a lot of it very hard to understand. She's took an asthma attack last night just before 10. Couldn't catch her breath, nothing Nicky or his 2 boys could do. Fuck me imagine that, someone you love gasping for air and your just so utterly useless.
She died before the ambulance arrived, how the fuck do you deal with that? Their 2 boys, same age as my lad 16 & 17 have just watched their mum die whilst frantically trying to give her anything to help her breath.

I can't get my fucking head around it, I told him I can't get home until Wednesday night and she'll be buried by then, what use am I as a friend.
Their lads played football with my son, we got talking on the sidelines and have been good buddies for 10 years now.

It's a cruel fucking world lads

[Van Halen are Fucking Pump]

Terrible news Keith.

[VAN HALEN]

Blimey, that's horrible. So what's the next step for you then?

[Le Cut Inside Mane]

Fuckinghell sorry to hear that mate. Bit paranoid reading it as I have trouble breathing sometimes too.

[Damie Karras]

Blimey, that's horrible. So what's the next step for you then?

Not a lot I can do, the funeral is Monday but I can't get home until Wednesday

My sister thinks if I feel I'm missing the family I should give up the job but I was doing fine up until this

[Lap]

Dontgiveupthe job mate. Looking after your family comes first and if that means work so be it. Your dedication to your mate won't be in doubt . For what it's worth I go through the same stuff quite frequently now I'm living in Dublin . Lots of funerals back up north of people I knowbut it's really not possible to go